Month: December 2004

So I wanted to get one last entry in about my last few days of 2004 before next year.

Tuesday night I went to Portillo’s to have dinner with Daniella and Christina. They went to go see the Aviator. They invited me but I wasn’t interesting. Daniella told me good call on that cuz it was waaaay too long. Plus after they went I had heard that Leonardo DiCrapio does some naked stuffs in there and I definitely do not need to see that.

Mark [Czynski] works there and he was getting off just as Daniella and Christina were leaving and he was going to have dinner by himself, so I stayed a while so he wouldn’t have to eat alone.

Yesterday I went to the mall to find something to wear for tonight, because it’s a black and white party and I didn’t have anything to wear. I was also planning on buying pajamas, because I found a hole in the butt of my pants and because the shirt I wear is the one Frank gave me and it’s mostly white so the fact that I keep getting food on it means it is time to stop wearing it, because that is definitely not something I want to be ruined. I also wanted to buy the Clay Aiken calendar and maybe go to some shoe stores and look at ROOS, because I really want a pair. And if I had time to buy some new bras, because 2/3 of women wear the wrong size and I am almost positive I am one of them haha.

So I went to JCPenney and found this really cute shirt, but it had some light pink on it, so I called Daniella to find out if it was okay and she said she’d let me in cuz I’m kind of cool haha. It turns out she was on her way to the mall with her friend to get a peticure and she asked if I wanted to get dinner, so I had less time at the mall than I thought, but she said she’d be a while. So I found this really cute black shirt and creme coloured pants. Then I went downstairs to see if Elva was working and she was, so I talked to her for a while. Then I left.

I thought I had a lot of time to kill so I went past Abercrombie to see if Brian was working so I could say hi to him. I really did not want to go in. There was a guy up front and I asked if Brian was working and he said he had no idea (I’m sorry but that store is so small, how could you not know if someone you work with is working there?), but that i could go in. Great. So I went in and umm yeah people were staring at me like I don’t belong there, because I don’t. And he wasn’t working. Note to self: don’t ever do that again.

Right after I walked out Daniella called and I convinced her to eat at El Famous Burrito. But first I went to the calendar store to find the calendar and they were definitely SOLD OUT. The lady said they went really fast. So I went to Barnes and Noble and they too were sold out. So I went to El Famous Burrito. The guys there have finally figured out that I am not Mexican, because they tried talking to me in Spanish last time I was there, and I understood what they were saying (“¿Como estas?” is not hard to understand lol), but I answered in English and that is when they stopped talking to me, so now they are not creepy anymore lol. So we’re eating and this girl walks in and she is totally an RA at Eastern and she gave us a tour when we went and I said hi to her and she didn’t remember me but she was really excited because I want to go there lol. She is from Libertyville.

After dinner I went home because Marni said she needed the car, only to find her leaving with my Dad right when I pulled up, and I had already left Vernon Hills, so I decided to go to Super Target and I hadn’t been there before. I found blue Tinkebell pajama pants and a shirt to match. Which is great, because my Tinkerbell sweatshirt is blue, although a different shade.

Then I came home and went on to Amazon to buy the Clay calendar but it was mega expensive, so I went to and it listed the top 10 most popular calendars on the entire web site and Clay’s was at number SIX, even above The OC, that’;s awesome!

But the front page of Amazon has a thing where you can donated money to the Red Cross to help out the Tsunami victims, so I went back to Amazon to donate some money, and while I had my debit card out and was thinking about it, decided to head over the Bubel/Aiken Foundation web site to donate some money, but when you register you have to do it by how old you are and if you are under 20 years of age, you have to give one of your parent’s e-mail address, so I said screw that and I am just going to donate in two months when I am 20 (me so old aww). But I did apply for the Bubel/Aiken Foundation credit card. I’m glad I found that because I need to establish credit and BankOne sucks and I have been looking for a cool credit card like that. Now I just have to be approved lol.

I just did some end of the year buddy list cleaning. There are 52 less screen names than there were before, not including Jim and Brian Granneman, which I had taken off a while ago, and I know I never wrote about what happened with Brian Granneman, because it doesn’t matter. I took off screen names of people I haven’t talked to in a million years, people that never come on anymore and should have been taken off a few years ago, but since they never come on, I forgot about them, like Mr Carroll haha, umm took off Danna, like 12 of Melissa’s broken screen names, and yes, I took of Matt. And I took him out of my phone too. I was considering writing him an e-mail telling him that I am really hurt that I haven’t heard from him, but I decided that wouldn’t be prudent at this juncture. Today is the last day I am going to dwell on what a shitty friend he is (no more swearing after today either!!!). Yeah, so definitely no more kissing of guys that we don’t like grr.

This is the way that I state my independence
That I’m no longer connected to your memory
This is the day that I’m making my defection
That I claim back the affection that you stole from me
I used to hear your music so loud
But it’s so low, you’re just another face in the crowd
I’m letting you know…

No more sad songs
I’m letting it go now
Switch off, switch on
I’m letting you know
You turned out the light
I’m gonna be alright
When I turn the radio on
No more sad songs

So anyway, ending with a fantastic quote. “The only reason people go to bars is to get drunk and have sex. To me, bars are what hell is like.” -Clay Aiken

Okay, yeah, that is amazing. That is definitely the kind of guy I want to marry and I was beginning to think that there aren’t any like that. Apparently I was wrong. Everybody needs to read his autobiography. Haha next time I want to date a guy I am going to make him read that book, because after reading it I decided that Clayton is exactly the type of guy I want. It is too bad that he is unattainable. That’s alright, I’m sure I’ll find one just as great, but he probably won’t have a set of pipes like that lol.

Happy New Year!


Okay so I looked up the GPA you need to keep financial aid and what I have after this semester is not even high enough to be on probation, which means no financial aid for next semester. At the very least, the $1500 that I got from them for leftover financial aid last semester will cover tuition, fees, and books for this semester. That’s still a lot of money, but technically they’d still be paying for it lol. Well even with this information, I decided I should repent, repent, repent, and pray that I don’t lose my financial aid, even though I didn’t think it was possible. Well I definitely just got a letter in the mail telling me I am on CAUTION…which means probation, so I still have my financial aid for next semester!!!!

Whoever says God doesn’t answer prayers doesn’t know what they’re talking about.

Thank You, God. So much. You have been so good to me, especially these past nine days. I don’t know what I did to deserve all this good luck recently, but I am so grateful. Please just help me get into Eastern for the fall…

It’s hard to be a Jew on Christmas
My Friends won’t let me join in any games..
And I can’t sing Christmas songs
Or decorate a Christmas tree..
Or leave water out for Rudolph
cuz there’s something wrong with me..
*My people don’t believe in Jesus Christ’s divinity..
I’m a Jew, a Lonely Jew.. on Christmas.

Hanukkah is nice, but why is it
That Santa passes over my house every year?
And instead of eating ham
I have to eat Kosher Latkes..
Instead of Silent Night
I’m singing hou-hach-tou-gavish..
And what the f*ck is up
With lighting all these f*cking Candles, tell me please?
I’m a Jew, a Lonely Jew..
I’d be merry, but i’m Hebrew.. on Christmas.

*I do, but I am not the one who wrote the song

Christmas in a psych ward

Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

I Think I’ll Be Home for Christmas

Silent Anhedonia, Holy Anhedonia, All is Flat, All is Lonely.

Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Busses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and…

We Three Queens Disoriented Are

Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,…………(better start again)

Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me.

On the First Day of Christmas My True Love Gave to Me (and then took it all away).

You Better Watch Out, I’m Gonna Cry, I’m Gonna Pout, Maybe I’ll tell you Why.

Do you Hear What I Hear?

I forgot to mention a couple things from the other day. First of all, our seats were freaking awesome. It was in the Chicago Theatre, which is really small, so any seat would probably be really good, but we were only MAIN FLOOR in the freaking CENTER!!!

Second of all, Daniella and Christina were in line to meet Clay right in front of me and Kelly. So Kelly went up and I couldn’t really hear what he was saying until he said “What’s your name—Daniella? No, that was her name.” Haha Freudian Slip…Clay wants Daniella. See, people, he’s not gay! He just likes seventeen year old girls…

This is a baby picture of him, how cute!

Okay so the teacher for my Film and Society class was listed on as like the worst teacher at CLC, so I wanted to change times, but the other classes were all filled. Turns out Pat Gonder is teaching one of the other classes and that web site has him listed as like the best teacher at CLC, plus I have heard from other people that he’s amazing, so I e-mailed him to see if I could get into his class even though it’s full and he said I should keep checking to see if a spot opens up, so the good timing continues this week, as I checked and somebody had dropped it!! So I am really excited about that. So I was going to make an entry saying this is my FINAL schedule for REAL, but I decided not to. And it’s a good thing, because I just changed it again lol. I changed Ethics classes because I was looking at the books required and my teacher has like Plato and St Augustine and The Fountainhead listed and all the other teachers have books about morals, which is what I want. But like everything is full so the choice was between 6:30pm on Mondays or 9:30am on Saturdays. So now almost everything is at night blah. It’s alright, I’ll live. Just gotta tape 7th Heaven and The OC. So here is my REAL final schedule for next semester…

ENG 121 English Composition I 9-9:50
CMM 121 Fundamentals of Speech 10-10:50
PHI 125 Intro to Ethics 6:30-9:15pm
HUM 221 American Decades 5-6:15pm
ENG 121 English Composition I 9-9:50
CMM 121 Fundamentals of Speech 10-10:50
HUM 222 Film and Society 7-10pm
HUM 221 American Decades 5-6:15pm
PSC 221 Comparative Political Systems 6:30-9:15pm
ENG 121 English Composition I 9-9:50
CMM 121 Fundamentals of Speech 10-10:50

My chastity ring arrived on Monday. It came with a poem…

This ring’s a special symbol
of the promise that I’ve made.
With Your help, O Lord, I know
its glow will never fade.

With Your help, Lord, I’ll stand firm
though some may criticize.
For whose opinion matters,
if I look good in Your eyes?

Who can give me anything
to take the place of You?
Who on Earth can justify
a love that isn’t true?

So, I make my statement,
on my hand and in my heart.
I know, one day, I’ll hear You say
I chose the better part.

The world calls this old fashioned;
still, I’ll wait–it’s just a while.
For Honor, Truth, and Faithfulness
are never out of style.

It also came with a pledge that I had to sign and date.

With confidence in His power to strengthen me, I make a promise this day to God, my family, myself, my future spouse, and my future children; to remain sexually pure until the day I give myself as a wedding gift to my spouse. I know that God requires this of me, that He loves me, and that He will reward me for my faithfulness, in this life, and in the next.

In other news, for the first time in four years, I actually have something to do on New Year’s, yay!! Daniella invited me to her black and white party. Now I just gotta go to the mall and find something to wear.

Also, I think everyone needs to listen to this song. It’s a Christmas song, really funny. I’d put it as background music, except I really like Wassail Song. thank you, Dick Biondi.

I scored
on the classic 400 Point Purity Test!
Take the test here!

So remember the entry I made last night? Yeah, about that…

So I went to bed last night at 11pm, which is pretty much unheard of, in my life. I had to leave the house by 4:15am, hence going to bed at such an early hour. Marni knew I had to leave real early, and yet she decided to turn on the washing machine AND take a shower (my room is right next to the bathroom and my head right next to the shower) at 2:00am and I was unable to fall asleep. So I layed in bed until about 3:30 and then I came downstairs, ate breakfast, got ready, and my mom drove me to the Round Lake train station, where I met up with Kelly and her friends Rick and Bob. We took the 4:56am train to Union Station, grabbed some McDonald’s, and took a cab to the Borders on State St.

I guess I should explain why. Well Clay had a concert tonight at the Chicago Theatre and was scheduled to do a book signing at Borders directly across the street. The deal was the first 300 people in line were guaranteed to meet him and they would try their darndest for the rest. The tickets would be handed out at 8am and he would be there from noon-1:30pm.

So when we got there, the line was pretty long. Apparently we were at about 310, which is just great, but we decided to stay in line anyway, cuz we were so close. The first people in line had been there since freaking noon yesterday!!! Oy. There were these two girls in front of us from Vernon Hills, Daniella and Christina. Anyway, we got there at 6:30am, and now this is Chicago near the end of December, so obviously we were not very warm. Anyway, at 8am they decided they were going to let 600 people into the building, the first 300 on the third floor (where the signing was to be done) and the second 300 on the second floor. The third floor people got red tickets, which meant they were guaranteed to meet him, and the rest of us got yellow tickets which meant there is no guarantee. Eventually they told us that they would let the first 300 people go and then take the next ones in groups of 50, which was great, because that meant even though we weren’t ‘guaranteed’ to meet him, we were guaranteed to meet him. Then after a while they said there was going to be enough time for all 600 people to have him sign up to three books each (he would only sign books), but he wouldn’t have time to personalize them and we couldn’t take pictures or really talk to him and if we wanted to give him anything we had to clear it with security first.

Okay so we wound up waiting inside until 1:15pm. Fortunately, they told us we could get up to go to the cafe or to the bathrooms. After we had been inside for like an hour, I finally started to get the feeling back in my toes, so when Daniella said she wanted to go get food, but didn’t want to go by herself, I volunteered to go with. AFter waiting in that line for 45 minutes, I went to the bathroom and spent 45 minutes waiting in line there, all the while I had left my book and my purse with Christina, who I didn’t even know (nothing happened, I was just saying). It was crazy, because they were letting the girls use the men’s bathroom too. So it was really boring waiting around for so many hours. I wound up buying Hayley a book, because I had invited her to come with and her parents wouldn’t let her. Oh and also, Kelly’s friends had gone home after maybe a half hour cuz they were sick of waiting and didn’t want to see him.

So anyway at 1:15pm we finally got upstairs. Wow, they always talk about how he has freckles and I’m always like “What freckles?” Well guess what, he has freckles. They are all over his face. Lots of them. He signed my books, shook hands with me (his hand was really warm) and asked me how I’m doing and what my name was. I was able to sneak in a quick “I just want to thank you for your music because when ever I am feeling down I can listen to it and it always makes me feel better.” Then he said thank you and Merry Christmas. I was a little upset with the latter, because he needs to realise that not all his fans celebrate Christmas. Anyway, it turns out they really only let the first 350 people meet him, so we were sooo lucky. Oh yeah and I am pretty sure I was the only person there who was not going into major hyperventilation/shock/freak out mode right before meeting him. My goodness people, he’s just a person…with immense talent.

Ooh also, Kelly and I did not have tickets to the concert and it was definitely sold out, but this woman came up to us and told us she upgraded their seats and wanted to know if we wanted to buy her old ones off of her for $30 each, even though she paid $45.50. She wouldn’t take any more than $30, so we said okay. Woohoo!

So then we [me and Kelly] had from like 1:15 til they opened the concert doors (7pm…it started at 8pm) to kill. We did a lot of nothing. We went to Navy Pier because it turned out that they had a free trolley service. We got some lunch, but we weren’t there for long because we had to go to the Hyatt to pick up our tickets, then we stayed at the Hyatt and just sat around for like an hour or so and I called Hayley to let her know I got her an autograph and she goes “Hold on” and I heard her whisper “Jami Robins got me Clay Aiken’s autograph!!!!” Haha. I really wanted to have dinner at Water Tower Place, but it just did not work out. So we went back to Borders (ugh) and sat in the cafe for a little while, then we went to Jamba Juice, because it was like two doors down and I had never had it before. Then we went to Old Navy wuntil about 6:50pm and on the way to the theatre, stopped in front of the windows at Marshall Fields to admire the displays, the theme is Snow White and they are so amazing.

Okay so we got to the theatre a little before 7pm and the majority of people were at least 16 or 17 and there were a lot of women in their 40s-50s and up. Which was great, because that meant there would be WAY less screaming than there usually is at his concerts. Hallelujah, Amen, Yeahbo. So apparently the Chicago Theatre is a really class place and Kelly and I felt really bad with our jeans on, but they let us in, thank God. However, it was like Nazi land in there. I mean if you think MHS is bad, don’t ever go to a show at the Chicago Theatre. As soon as we got in the door they made me throw out my freaking Aquafina, which I had been saving all day for the concert, made everyone open their purses and bags and they looked through them, and told me and Kelly we would have to check our Borders bags (plastic bags with two Clay Aiken books each) at the coat check, and we were like eff that, so we smuggled them in and did not get caught. She also smuggled her camera in, which were not allowed either. Oh man did they crack down with the cameras. They were confiscating them in the middle of the show, and in the second to last song, they were goin off like crazy and the security people were on a rampage and actually started escorting people out, because they were using cameras. Kelly is EXTREMELY lucky she did not get caught!!!

So yeah, once again he gave each of his backup singers their own songs, and it’s funny because now people are scvreaming out WE LOVE YOU JACOB haha. He also had some kids choir and the choir from Proviso East singing with him. Now here is the thing, he really does have vocal chord damage and you can totally hear it when he sings. Okay it’s called REST YOUR VOICE. Whatever. He’s still so amazing though, he just needs to take a break.

So then Daniella and Christina’s dad drove me and Kelly back, cuz he didn’t want us to take the train home and we wound up getting home like 20-30 minutes earlier than we would have, had we taken the train. So that was my long day, and now I must go add Daniella to my LJ friends list, watch Roseanne, and SLEEP!!!

EDIT: Why is it not letting me paste quiz results into here?

So I just finished reading Clay Aiken’s, more or less, autobiography, Learning to Sing: Hearing the Music in Your Life and it definitely made me cry. I was thinking about what I would say to him, if ever I got the chance to meet him. And I think I would probably cry. And not because I am some screaming teenage girl, but because whenever I am feeling down, I can just listen to his music and I feel so much better. And I don’t know if it is because you can feel God’s love through Clay’s voice, or what. But I would thank him. And while I was thanking him, I would probably start to cry. And then it would look like I am a screaming teenage girl, and I don’t want to come off like that. Hmm…

Okay that song was extremely obnoxious, time for a new one. If you were in Master Singers with me, you should definitely turn up your volume right now.

So this is a direct quote from Ashlee and Jessica Simpson’s Dad about Ashlee “She’s going to be a huge movie star. She’s like Meg Ryan or Cameron Diaz, with probably more depth.”

I don’t even need to comment on that *snicker*.


have you?
[ ]been drunk
[ ]smoked pot
[x]kissed a member of the opposite sex
[x]rode in a taxi
[x]been dumped
[ ]shoplifted
[/]been fired
[x]had a job
[ ]been in a fist fight
[ ]snuck out of your parents house
[ ]almost been arrested
[ ]stole something from your job
[ ]celebrated new years in time square
[ ]went on a blind date
[ ]smoked a cigarette
[ ]gone on an airplane by your self
[ ]broken a bone
[ ]had sex in a car
[x]white lied to a friend
[x]went swimming in your bathtub
[ ]had a crush on a teacher
[ ]celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans
[x]been to europe
[x]made out in a movie theatre
[ ]taken caffiene pills
[ ]been to disney land
[x]had a crush on some one you hardly knew
[ ]been to california
[ ]been skinny dipping
[x]regretted something
[ ]peed on some ones lawn
[x]skipped school
[ ]thrown up from drinking
[ ]lost your sibling
[ ]kissed a member of the same sex
[ ]had sex with a boy
[ ]had sex with a girl
[x]been in a car accident
[ ]partied for days and days straight
[x]had a family member die
[x]played clue
[x]had a sleepover party
[x]went ice skating
[ ]dropped x
[ ]been cheated on
[x ]had a boyfriend
[ ]had a girlfriend
[ ]had a threesome
[ ]had a sweet 16
[ ]had a car

do you?

[ ]have a boyfriend
[ ]have a girlfriend
[ ]have a crush
[ ]have a dog
[x]have your own room
[ ]listen to rap
[ ]listen to rock
[ ]paint your nails
[ ]play a sport
[ ]play more than one sport
[ ]have more than one best friend
[ ]get good grades )
[/]play an instrument
[ ]have slippers
[ ]wear boxers
[ ]wear black eyeliner
[x]like the color blue
[ ]like the color yellow
[ ]like to read
[ ]like to write
[x ]have long hair
[ ]have short hair
[x]have a cell phone
[ ]have a pager

are you?

[ ]bilingual
[ ]black
[ ]mexican
[ ]medium
[ ]tall
[ ]grounded
[ ]talking to someone
[ ]IMing some one
[x]scared to die
[ ]on the phone
[ ]in your room
[ ]drinking something
[ ]eating something
[x]in your jammies
[x]listening to music
[ ]homophobic

Okay so I e-mailed this woman from Eastern and told her that my GPA is not going to be 2.0 and asked if I should just wait til I can raise my GPA and just apply for Spring 2005 and she said I should just apply for the fall to get the ball rolling and then work hard next semester, because they can’t officially accept me until I have 30 credit hours anyway, and because I have to take Eng 121 again, it would take me until the end of the summer semester to have 30 plus credits, so I went on a search to find either a two credit class or two one credit classes for next semester, since I was already at 16 hours and the computer own’t let you sign up for more than 18 hours. So the only things they have in one or two credit hours are music classes and I really don’t want to take choir, but I didn’t have a choice, so I went to sign up and it’s full and I can’t take band, because I haven’t been in band in five years and I don’t think I would be able to keep up, plus the fact that it’s been so long that I have touched my saxophone, that the keys are probably frozen—though I do have a dollar bill in my case, not that it matters, because I won’t be taking band. ANYWAY, I realised that I can get rid of Bio, since it is four credit hours, and replace it with a three hour class and add an extra three credit hour class. And it worked. So here is the final copy of my schedule next semester.

ENG 121 English Composition I 9-9:50
CMM 121 Fundamentals of Speech 10-10:50
HUM 222 Film and Society 1-4pm
PHI 125 Intro to Ethics 12:30-1:45
HUM 221 American Decades 5-6:15pm
ENG 121 English Composition I 9-9:50
CMM 121 Fundamentals of Speech 10-10:50
PHI 125 Intro to Ethics 12:30-1:45
HUM 221 American Decades 5-6:15pm
PSC 221 Comparative Political Systems 6:30-9:15pm
ENG 121 English Composition I 9-9:50
CMM 121 Fundamentals of Speech 10-10:50

Wow…18 hours of like REAL academic stuff…

Good luck to ya,