12 Ways the Bible would be different if it were written by college students

12. ‘Blood of Christ’ switched from red wine to keg beer.

11. Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning: cold!

10. Ten Commandments are actually only five, double-spaced, and written in a large font.

9. New edition every two years in order to limit reselling.

8. Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn’t dorm food.

7. Paul’s Letter to the Romans becomes Paul’s E-Mail To:

6. Reason Cain killed Abel: They were roommates.

5. The place where the end of the world occurs: Finals, not Armageddon.

4. Out go the mules; In come the mountain bikes.

3. Reason why Moses and followers walked in desert for 40 years: They didn’t want to ask directions and look like Freshmen.

2. Tower of Babel blamed for Foreign Language requirement.

1. Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, He would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.

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2 comments

  1. No, I haven’t been to a rainforest cafe since my band trip in 2003… and that was in California. Yesterday I was working at the Party in the Park 2005, a big rock concert in Central Park of Grayslake to support the Grayslake Youth Center. Why do you ask?

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